This is exactly why I buy presents. If I give my dad $250, he will not buy a smart thermostat. The economic utility to him of a smart thermostat is not that high versus, say, $250 in gasoline or food. He'll fill his tank every time. He does _want_ a smart thermostat - it's just not justifiable to him at the price point. At the same time, though he likes having food and gasoline, having more will not bring him joy per se.
That's where the gift giving comes in. I buy him a smart thermostat, effectively giving him license to have the nice object he cannot otherwise justify†. The economic destruction is the point.
This is such a good anecdote - the point of gifts is that you sometimes know your people better than they do themselves. You get them something to improve their lives in a way that they might not be aware of.
Referring to the example in the article - That argyle sweater from the aunt. Maybe the aunt doesn't think you need a new iPod. Maybe she wants the girls at your school to think you have an actual healthy family looking out for you.
Maybe they are aware of it but they prioritize things differently and are unwilling to occasionally indulge themselves in a luxury expense. I know people who literally sent their parents on vacation as a gift because they would never do it themselves. Not that they weren't aware they needed/wanted a vacation but that given the choice it is not something they would rather spend their money on.
As an adult with a good job, there is nothing in the typical "gift price range" that I really want or need but don't have - if there were, I'd buy it myself. You have to really know me to understand what falls in the "he'd like it but wouldn't bother to get it himself" category. OTOH as I simplify my life it turns out some of my most valued items that I'm keeping around were very expensive gifts that fall in that same category because of the high price.
Edit: This does suggest a strategy of pooling everyones money together to get a single gift that a person would not otherwise buy.
Not to be "that [old] person" but I do feel like the internet has ruined gift-giving a bit. It used to be that if you traveled somewhere or happened upon a unique shop you could find a gift that the recipient would have otherwise never have known about or come across on their own. Now everything is commodified. Everyone can get everything from everywhere in the world whenever they want.
> You have to really know me to understand what falls in the "he'd like it but wouldn't bother to get it himself" category.
This is the crux of gift-giving: Noticing throughout a year whenever your significant other(s) wish they had something, and then they forget about it, but you don’t, and 6 months later, they get it.
And it requires a level of being there to pull that off. With the exception of my wife, for whom I do keep a list, I don't spend enough time with even my immediate family so that come Christmas time I have no idea what to get them.
It's almost as if humans are emotional beings that strive to make themselves and those around them happy, even at the expense of micro-inefficiencies.
This guy must be great at parties... "You know, you should really remove the ice from your soda and drink it warm. Studies have shown that it will help your body maintain a more consistent blood-glucose, preventing a sugar crash"
Yeah exactly, it ignores the emotional reinforcement of buying somebody a gift, especially if it is their love language. My wife loves it when I buy her a new jotter and pen even though she could easily buy them herself.
I'm not sure what you're talking about. Are you saying I should give every person in my extended family of dozens of people a gift each holiday season, and put lots of thought into each gift? And you're here with an "ugh" in my face if I don't follow your expectation?
I have some choice words for you if that's what you're seriously suggesting, but maybe I misunderstood.
Regardless, personally judging people for their gift-giving practices in families you know nothing about is obnoxious. I strongly encourage you to reconsider that practice.
While the article's point is well-taken and frequently correct, I'll disagree in part.
In the best of cases, the value brought by a gift can radically exceed the market value of the gift itself.
Time with a loved-one or assistance in a time of need can, indeed, be priceless; something the recipient could not have realistically gotten for themselves, especially on short notice, at any price.
A gift of something that someone would, without doubt, enjoy but never acquire for themselves can also unlock value that otherwise never would have existed. I can think of a few such gifts in my lifetime that made a huge impression.
A helpful rubric in most cases, though, is to ask, "does the gift I'm about to give impose significant obligations onto the recipient?" If so, it may be very wise to alter the gift in such a way as to limit the ways in which the recipient's future may be restricted.
Cash is pretty good in this regard -- it carries few obligations and is as fungible as anything created by humans. It can frequently be traded for time, the most-precious of all commodities.
Gifts serve social and political purposes and are not simply a medium of economic exchange. Historically, gifts were a way of signaling surplus to gain trusted friends, establish status, make alliances, compensate victims of wrong-doing and squelching the rage of would-be enemies.
The loss of efficiency and the wasted resources are precisely the point. "I have enough to destroy my own wealth for your benefit" was, for most of human history, the way to gain status in your tribe. Productive and occasionally generous people became leaders.
In modern western culture, the mutual holiday gift exchange may not seem like it has much to do with status - but then why do we open gifts in full public view rather than retreating to separate rooms to open them in private? There is clearly a family/social dynamic at play that goes well beyond economic exchange. You could even re-frame the "waste" of gift giving as an investment in social infrastructure.
The point of gifts for most people is to remind them of their loved ones.
Sure, that bottle of wine might not have been the one you would have bought on your own, but the fact that you can say “hey let’s try that wine X got for us” is a utility-adding thing for most people.
Sounds like (as is often common In economics and social sciences) the researcher didn’t do a good job of understanding his own biases before publishing.
This might be true, and I'll admit that I didn't read the article, but I would add that not everything can be explained by economic efficiency. For example: poems--a really bad use of your time (think of the opportunity cost), drawings from your 6 year daughter--almost worthless on the resale market, a ticket for free hugs--completely unsustainable business model. But you know, sometimes it's good just to be a human, with memories of other humans doing human things. Naps, too, are bad for business, but somehow I never regret taking one.
It's hard to go wrong with some bars of chocolate. In case the receiver doesn't fancy chocolates, they can either be served to guests, or even regifted (just try to avoid cycling back to original giver:-).
If it's somebody's 60th birthday, try find a bar with a clearly advertised 60% cocoa content to add some personalization.
Of course this only works as a relatively low value gift...
I would give cash or a gift card to a teenager who I know has preferences/wishes that I will barely understand.
But for a working adult I would prefer to give nothing or just write a thoughtful letter.
The act of gifting money to an adult even in close family to me would come across as condescending. It would imply that I feel they are somehow unable to take care of themselves.
Cash carries its own (comparatively small) costs -- one need only look at the lives of lottery winners or the Alternative Minimum Tax to see that even cash isn't always free.
I hate gift giving entirely. Not for economic or ideological reasons, but because buying gifts stresses me the hell out. I don't even like receiving gifts because they come with an unspoken implicit reciprocation. This means I have to buy them something at some point. The better and more thoughtful the gift to me, the greater the anxiety and stress that I feel about trying to be a good a friend by getting something as good and thoughtful for them -- I am terrible at this. I end up getting something they don't want or need which instead of being a good, is a net negative for them because now they have to pretend to like it and then store this unnecessary thing for an indefinite period. Some people do like giving gifts and are good at, I am not and hate it. Now some people may read this and may suggest getting an experiential gift like buying dinner or so on, and yes I have thought of these but its not the same. If I go out with someone and pick up the check, it doesn't have the same gravitas as giving them a wrapped box with a thing in it.
I agree. For example, holiday gift-giving seems to be taken on as a dreary and/or anxious obligation by everyone I know.
I guess we do it for the subset of people whose "love language" is gifts. But it would be gauché to just give gifts to those people, so now we have to do this whole mess.
One relative of mine insists on getting me gifts. They seem to think that they know what I'd like better than I do, but they don't! I frequently don't like the gifts they give.
I've tried to guide them towards better choices by giving them a wishlist every year and even giving them a few rules. But they don't use the wishlist as much as they should, and they try to bend the rules. "Oh, you said that you didn't want X, so I thought it would be nice to get you X'." I have to think about how they are going to misinterpret any rule I give them now.
Perhaps the worst part is that they get somewhat offended when I point out that I don't want particular gifts. They also frequently point out when you're using their gift. For example, I don't know how many times they've told me "nice shirt" when I wore I shirt they bought me. I also suspect that they get somewhat offended if they don't see me using their gift.
I guess the headline "Jewish Economics Professor Thinks Christmas Should Work More Like Hanukkah" might have given the wrong impression.
Lest others get the wrong impression: I just think it's funny, it isn't intended to cast aspersion on Professor Waldfogel, Santa Claus, or anyone else.
The Chinese also favor gifts of cash over gifts of stuff in many circumstances. It has advantages when it isn't culturally inappropriate.
I would add that I consider a thoughtful gift more valuable than the cash would be, because it shows caring in a more specific way than a red envelope or gelt. But is the median gift thoughtful? I'll leave that for the professors.
That's where the gift giving comes in. I buy him a smart thermostat, effectively giving him license to have the nice object he cannot otherwise justify†. The economic destruction is the point.
†Based on a true story.