I'm not going to tell you about your job or surrounding, but a little about how your brain, or rather everbody's brain works.
The problem at hand is a relatively unknown psychological issue.
There are many theories about motivation. Most of them don't account for a specific type or situation, where someone is just not able to do a certain piece of work, without having a reason like lacking the time, health, skills or energy. These types are often just dismissed and dubbed underachievers, because, for some reason, they fail to acomplish tasks which they should be perfectly able to do. They procrastinate and do a million other things first or just give it up completely.
It doesn't matter whether this task is about work, university grades, doing lab-experiments, the laundry or else.
== The theory ==
There is a austrian psychologist, Brigitta Rollett, who coined a term called "Anstrengungsvermeidungsmotivation" which translates to "effort avoidance motivation" or "stress avoidance motivation".
The first essential postulate of the theory is, that having the "motivation" to avoid stress, or efforts that cause stress, isn't an illness or failure, but rather an evolutionary advantage to prevent burnout and similar issues. All people tend to avoid activities, which cause them stress or more specifically the very basic emotion of disgust. People have different pattern and triggers which lead to the feeling of disgust. This is heavily primed by upbringing, schooling, bad experiences etc.
You seem to be disgusted by "useless features". (I am too. :))
The second essential postulate of the theory is, that this disgust is more or less "invisible". Most of the time it goes unnoticed.
It is such a strong emotion that people never even want to "go near it", because it would cause them IMMENSE emotional pain. This pain can even translate to physical symptoms like head-aches etc.
This is how the afore-mentioned "underachievers" are explained. They don't have a problem per se. As long as nobody forces them to do the specific tasks they don't like to do, they live happily ever after.
People with a high IQ tend to learn a lot of these "disgust" pattern, because on the one hand they are often confronted with teachers, who don't understand them or meet them with antipathy and on the other hand they never needed to learn to deal with "repulsive efforts". Contrary to most people they get by, without ever having really stressed themselves. Should they come into a situation, however, where they HAVE or WANT to deal with a task, which for them is linked to disgust, they fall into complete despair.
They do everything to get away from the triggered emotion.
It's literally TERRIBLE for them to do some kinds of work, which aren't a problem for most others.
There have been many scientific studies, tests and validations of this (in german).
== Your situation ==
First you have to acknowledge and understand that what you are experiencing is an irrational and immensely intense emotion.
Emotions don't think. When you encounter one, you have to decide how to act on it. If your job sucks it's probably a good idea to just work somewhere else.
But you like your job. In your case, the emotion just tells you that you HATE this type of work-situation.
And for whatever reason you are not able to just acknowledge that, bite the bullet and move on. (Which is how people are able deal with most bad emotions.) In this particular case your brain throws one hell of a fit. Neurologically speaking and simplified, your rational forebrain looses control over your amygdala and the "more emotional" parts of your brain.
== What you can do ==
You can always make sure the situation never happens again, and avoid the dreaded tasks, but this probably won't work without giving up programming.
What you have to apply are the same strategies which are needed to conquer other emotions-gone-wild like irrational fears.
~ You NEED to work on it SLOWLY but STEADY. ~
* The bad news: I hate to tell you this, but if you want to change your behaviour, you NEED to sit down and start doing the exact work which triggers this cascade.
* The good news: Each day, or session, you only need to conquer it ONCE.
Sit down for the task and start with the tiniest bit. Just open the first file. When you FIRST feel the terror overwhelming you, you HAVE to force yourself to keep at it and wrestle it down. When you feel the terror approaching a SECOND time, you can stop.
If you have the energy to continue, do it, but I doubt you will. Don't stress yourself too much, or it will backfire. (You won't)
This might sound incredibly stupid, but be proud of yourself at this point, because you have just delivered an immense piece of emotional work and it's ok to be tired now.
Even if you just typed three words.
Keep repeating this practise each day, twice a day or how you see fit, and slowly but steady the terror will fade. It will come slower, lighter, less often. If you keep doing this, i will GUARANTEE you that these shenanigans will stop. You will slowly replace the old neurological patterns which trigger your pain. (And pain is exactly what it is.)
Unfortunately there is no faster way for this. You can look into hypnotherapy, which can accelerate matters a bit, but working on emotions always takes it's time. I have applied these techniques myself for a couple of situations. It was immensely exhausting, but it's worth it and it works.
The problem at hand is a relatively unknown psychological issue.
There are many theories about motivation. Most of them don't account for a specific type or situation, where someone is just not able to do a certain piece of work, without having a reason like lacking the time, health, skills or energy. These types are often just dismissed and dubbed underachievers, because, for some reason, they fail to acomplish tasks which they should be perfectly able to do. They procrastinate and do a million other things first or just give it up completely.
It doesn't matter whether this task is about work, university grades, doing lab-experiments, the laundry or else.
== The theory ==
There is a austrian psychologist, Brigitta Rollett, who coined a term called "Anstrengungsvermeidungsmotivation" which translates to "effort avoidance motivation" or "stress avoidance motivation".
The first essential postulate of the theory is, that having the "motivation" to avoid stress, or efforts that cause stress, isn't an illness or failure, but rather an evolutionary advantage to prevent burnout and similar issues. All people tend to avoid activities, which cause them stress or more specifically the very basic emotion of disgust. People have different pattern and triggers which lead to the feeling of disgust. This is heavily primed by upbringing, schooling, bad experiences etc. You seem to be disgusted by "useless features". (I am too. :))
The second essential postulate of the theory is, that this disgust is more or less "invisible". Most of the time it goes unnoticed. It is such a strong emotion that people never even want to "go near it", because it would cause them IMMENSE emotional pain. This pain can even translate to physical symptoms like head-aches etc.
This is how the afore-mentioned "underachievers" are explained. They don't have a problem per se. As long as nobody forces them to do the specific tasks they don't like to do, they live happily ever after. People with a high IQ tend to learn a lot of these "disgust" pattern, because on the one hand they are often confronted with teachers, who don't understand them or meet them with antipathy and on the other hand they never needed to learn to deal with "repulsive efforts". Contrary to most people they get by, without ever having really stressed themselves. Should they come into a situation, however, where they HAVE or WANT to deal with a task, which for them is linked to disgust, they fall into complete despair. They do everything to get away from the triggered emotion. It's literally TERRIBLE for them to do some kinds of work, which aren't a problem for most others.
There have been many scientific studies, tests and validations of this (in german).
== Your situation ==
First you have to acknowledge and understand that what you are experiencing is an irrational and immensely intense emotion.
Emotions don't think. When you encounter one, you have to decide how to act on it. If your job sucks it's probably a good idea to just work somewhere else.
But you like your job. In your case, the emotion just tells you that you HATE this type of work-situation. And for whatever reason you are not able to just acknowledge that, bite the bullet and move on. (Which is how people are able deal with most bad emotions.) In this particular case your brain throws one hell of a fit. Neurologically speaking and simplified, your rational forebrain looses control over your amygdala and the "more emotional" parts of your brain.
== What you can do ==
You can always make sure the situation never happens again, and avoid the dreaded tasks, but this probably won't work without giving up programming.
What you have to apply are the same strategies which are needed to conquer other emotions-gone-wild like irrational fears.
~ You NEED to work on it SLOWLY but STEADY. ~
* The bad news: I hate to tell you this, but if you want to change your behaviour, you NEED to sit down and start doing the exact work which triggers this cascade.
* The good news: Each day, or session, you only need to conquer it ONCE.
Sit down for the task and start with the tiniest bit. Just open the first file. When you FIRST feel the terror overwhelming you, you HAVE to force yourself to keep at it and wrestle it down. When you feel the terror approaching a SECOND time, you can stop. If you have the energy to continue, do it, but I doubt you will. Don't stress yourself too much, or it will backfire. (You won't)
This might sound incredibly stupid, but be proud of yourself at this point, because you have just delivered an immense piece of emotional work and it's ok to be tired now. Even if you just typed three words.
Keep repeating this practise each day, twice a day or how you see fit, and slowly but steady the terror will fade. It will come slower, lighter, less often. If you keep doing this, i will GUARANTEE you that these shenanigans will stop. You will slowly replace the old neurological patterns which trigger your pain. (And pain is exactly what it is.)
Unfortunately there is no faster way for this. You can look into hypnotherapy, which can accelerate matters a bit, but working on emotions always takes it's time. I have applied these techniques myself for a couple of situations. It was immensely exhausting, but it's worth it and it works.
Good luck.