I think one big feature of bloatware is differentiation. They want customers to choose phone based on which bloatware it has or doesn't have, because software is cheap. If everyone just wanted to maximize benchmark points or whatever technical spec for a given budget, and it was possible to do straight comparisons, profit margins would decrease. So they make up those extremely hard to compare offers to prevent that. Since customers will presumably try to find a product on the efficient surface, no one wants a product that is inferior in every respect, the approach is to make dimensionality as high as possible.

With offer a you get a fast cpu, a weather app, and free surf between sunday 1pm and sunday 3pm. With offer b you get lots of ram, control your tv app, and cheap calls within our network.