As someone that comes from a small town, I think you hit the nail on the head. It always felt so rude to not stop to listen to these people. It took me years to learn how to just keep walking without feeling terribly guilty. It helped when I realized from experience that the longer I listen and/or talk to them, the more likely they'll get pissed off if I don't give them something or buy something from them.
Absolutely true. It's difficult though, because their whole strategy is to make you uncomfortable. You're forced to modify your own behavior in a way that goes against your sense of kindness.
You are forced into uncharted behavioral territory. This causes anxiety and a strong wish to return to normal. The apparent kindliness and self-assurance of the salesman makes him look like a benevolent guru, a parent figure who will guide you out of the wilderness.
It is Stockholm syndrome in miniature. I have seen people thank the salesman who has just roped them into buying unwanted, overpriced junk. Hell, I have even seen people thank aggressive panhandlers and wish them well.
Thanks, that's a good way of looking at it. Nowadays, I have so much pent-up anger and rage at these types of people after coming to terms with all the years of being manipulated by them. They must sense it, because they tend to shut up when I glare at them.
One way I've managed to get past it is thinking how politely listening to them is wasting their time - time they need to make a real sale instead of me stringing them along.
And for the ones who push past that, well, annoying/ignoring the intentions of person you're selling to is sort of a jerk thing to do, so that mitigates the guilt a bit.
