You've sniped me and I'm going to try and tackle this over the weekend. What's the best way to exchange things for you? Also, have you explored modular multiplicative inverses at all?
I think the biggest rabbit hole I went down was trying to use FEAL (which is very breakable) and exploiting the things that make it breakable. But this is very much not my area of expertise - I was learning as I was working - so it's very possible either that that was a dumb idea or that it was a great idea that I didn't figure out.
I also considered things like "focus on add lots of entropy to groups of 200 or so UUIDs, but have obvious patterns beyond that" which I think would be a reasonable strategy; here I just kind of ran out of time (I told myself I'd make this in a week)
Did some light reading about a few other things but nothing substantial