Yeah, the other hand should be something like "don't define their worth by some achievement score, and just be happy".

It's hard to even put in clear words, let alone actually do the balance between these.

And the third hand, I suspect, is "the world is fast growing crueler than it was when I was young and I'm terrified of what may happen to my child when I'm old or dead and they're all on their own, so I'd better do everything I can to frontload everything they'll need while I'm able."

I don't know for sure; that all rather passed me by, though for where the state of the world seems heading I'm not actually sure I regret that too much. But they do also say the spectator sees more of the game.