And all during that time/process people will be trying to sort out how much of the success or lack of success of their peers reflects on their own success or lack of success. As folks work through that process they sometimes become enlightened, sometimes bitter, often cynical, and ideally wiser.
As someone who will be facing his 5 year college reunion, do you have any tips to deal with this floodgate of emotions? Personally, I'm planning to embellish my accomplishments by saying I have sired 5 kids.
Forewarned is forearmed, but seriously we all come to realize that emotion comes more quickly than reason. So take the emotions, note them, then when reason shows up evaluate. I've trained myself, and tried to impart on my kids, the notion that when ever a situation brings up an emotion the first thing to do is to note it and see if you can figure out where it is coming from, from there you can use it as data in determining your next steps.
But as a general rule, no I don't have any tips. I used to try to explain how having kids changed my whole being and outlook, but to people without kids it is like explaining color to a blind person, to people with kids its like explaining the obvious. Sorry.
Should one ignore emotions altogether, rule them out of one's life entirely?
AYN RAND: Of course not. One should merely keep them in their place. An emotion is an automatic response, an automatic effect of man's value premises. An effect, not a cause. There is no necessary clash, no dichotomy between man's reason and his emotions -- provided he observes their proper relationship. A rational man knows -- or makes it a point to discover -- the source of his emotions, the basic premises from which they come; if his premises are wrong, he corrects them. He never acts on emotions for which he cannot account, the meaning of which he does not understand. In appraising a situation, he knows why he reacts as he does and whether he is right. He has no inner conflicts, his mind and his emotions are integrated, his consciousness is in perfect harmony. His emotions are not his enemies, they are his means of enjoying life. But they are not his guide; the guide is his mind. This relationship cannot be reversed, however. If a man takes his emotions as the cause and his mind as their passive effect, if he is guided by his emotions and uses his mind only to rationalize or justify them somehow -- then he is acting immorally, he is condemning himself to misery, failure, defeat, and he will achieve nothing but destruction -- his own and that of others. http://ellensplace.net/ar_pboy.html
As someone who will be facing his 5 year college reunion, do you have any tips to deal with this floodgate of emotions? Personally, I'm planning to embellish my accomplishments by saying I have sired 5 kids.