You typically don't notice the advantages/disadvantages of having a degree from a good college. It's very silent, much like racial privilege. Very few jobs will openly reject you for not having a degree, but if you have a degree from a good school people recommend you more, and tend to assume you're smarter. They're more likely to value your opinion, more likely to brag about having you on their team. A lot of companies, even on the West Coast, will automatically grant you an interview for having a degree from a good school, or automatically deny you an interview for not having a degree. You gain access to a massive network-eg, if you contact someone from your same school, odds are high that they will take time out to talk to you. And so on.
This is probably less relevant for programming than it is for other professions, but in my observations it's a huge difference.
It is true there are a class of companies, bumpkin type companies like insurance companies, for instance, who hire engineers who care a great deal about degrees. There are also bumpkin bosses who think wouldn't interview someone who doesn't have a degree.
You know what? Those same companies and bosses are so caught up in their prejudice that when they see my resume, they never notice I don't have a degree! They still hire me.
The idea you need a "degree from a good college" is silliness.
Here's the thing. Kids aren't ready for the realities of the world. So a 12 year old who brings you their drawing-- even if its crappy- you're going to tell them its great.
All thru out their lives you want to encourage them to do well, so you tell them to get good grades so that they can go to a good college and then to get good grades at their college so they can get a good job.
That first year out of school, how you do in college does affect what kind of jobs you get offered.
But college has not taught you to be a professional. College is the last of the nurseries. When you get your job, you're in the real world. Colleges let you live in dorms and let you make more mistakes but it is still a coddling environment.
When you're in college you have no idea-- because this is your life and its been your life your whole life-- what the difference is between college and the real world.
Everything you're saying there is the assumption of an unspoken privilege. I'm telling you that privilege doesn't exist in the real world. IF you hustle and can sell yourself and have good skills, these things are far more deterministic of how far you go and what you earn than having a degree, let alone what college you went to for that degree.
This is probably less relevant for programming than it is for other professions, but in my observations it's a huge difference.