That’s not a dichotomy. In virtually all of design function is a prerequisite to prioritizing form, otherwise what you’re building might not even be possible and so you might not even be creating design but just art.
Thanks for taking my suggestion and changing what you said (from "all about" to "prioritizing"). Doesn't add much to the so-often regurgitated complaint I'm afraid.
Eh, your argument doesn’t really involve thinking and banks purely on semantics, which you are making arbitrarily strict and according to your personal preference. In practice, “just no-bullshit functional” as in my first comment doesn’t mean absolute neglect of form.
I’m sorry but you’re not as clever as you think, and your reasoning signals that you’re not known as a good communicator or collaborator in your organization.
It's your dichotomy, "reframe the paradigm" if you'd like. The typical regurgitation of this talking point is "prioritizes form over function."