Hacker Newsnew | past | comments | ask | show | jobs | submitlogin

I’m sorry to hear that, it’s a really hard mindset to grasp and we all falter here and there.

I can’t speak for anyone else (I don’t know your particular situation and do not want to assume anything) but I found that doing something for the sake of doing it was one of they key things that helped me overcome a feeling of being used/unappreciated.

In my personal experience and with a lot of introspection I found that the reason I had that feeling was that I personally had painted a picture of what gratitude should look and feel like when, in reality, we all express gratitude in different ways.

By painting that picture I had essentially built up an expectation as to what the outcome of my actions would be, and when that expectation failed to materialise the negative feelings ensued.

Something which I found massively helped with limiting my expectation was to have a mantra which I could repeat in my mind as a sort of short circuit to break the chain of negative thoughts.

The mantra can be anything, I went with ‘thank you’ as it is hard to feel anything other than gratitude when you are thanking someone/something



Hi, thanks for posting.

A mantra I use that some might find useful is:

"To the work you are entitled, but not to the fruits thereof."

Good luck on your journey!




Consider applying for YC's Winter 2026 batch! Applications are open till Nov 10

Guidelines | FAQ | Lists | API | Security | Legal | Apply to YC | Contact

Search: