I feel like there's nothing inherently wrong with having your work take up most of your mental space. With the way we have things set up, it seems natural to dedicate most of your attention to the place that your money comes from. What's wrong is that employers in the US don't reciprocate that attention. They're happy to have you committed to them without being committed to you. The power balance has gotten way out of whack. Time for unions to make a comeback I guess.