A large chunk of your daily behaviors are governed by habits. Habits are made up of cues followed by some sort of routine that you do which results in some sort of reward. If you want to change a habit then you need to focus on the cues that set off the routine. When a cue occurs, alter the routine and give yourself an alternate reward.
I used to have a drinking problem, say 1-2 bottles of wine a night every night. I cook almost every night in my house, so starting to cook dinner was a major cue for me to start drinking. Specifically, whenever I would put on my apron around 6pm I would get a strong urge to pour a glass of wine. I had a lot of difficulty resisting that urge even when I genuinely wanted to quit. It felt eerily automatic and involuntary. I didn't start having success until I focused on that cue and replaced the routine that followed it. For me, I decided I would put on my apron and immediately make myself a plate of fancy cheese and some crackers. I still had a routine and a reward after my cue, but the new routine was significantly less destructive.
So you're right with your exercise example that simply placing your gym bag by the door isn't going to be successful. You need some cue to go exercise, then exercise, then immediately reward yourself with some chocolate or your favorite candy or whatever.
I won't go so far as to say we can cure everyone's addiction with this one neat trick, but I have found it to be a useful framework on my life.
A large chunk of your daily behaviors are governed by habits. Habits are made up of cues followed by some sort of routine that you do which results in some sort of reward. If you want to change a habit then you need to focus on the cues that set off the routine. When a cue occurs, alter the routine and give yourself an alternate reward.
I used to have a drinking problem, say 1-2 bottles of wine a night every night. I cook almost every night in my house, so starting to cook dinner was a major cue for me to start drinking. Specifically, whenever I would put on my apron around 6pm I would get a strong urge to pour a glass of wine. I had a lot of difficulty resisting that urge even when I genuinely wanted to quit. It felt eerily automatic and involuntary. I didn't start having success until I focused on that cue and replaced the routine that followed it. For me, I decided I would put on my apron and immediately make myself a plate of fancy cheese and some crackers. I still had a routine and a reward after my cue, but the new routine was significantly less destructive.
So you're right with your exercise example that simply placing your gym bag by the door isn't going to be successful. You need some cue to go exercise, then exercise, then immediately reward yourself with some chocolate or your favorite candy or whatever.
I won't go so far as to say we can cure everyone's addiction with this one neat trick, but I have found it to be a useful framework on my life.