Most people don't take the word "bitching" as a sexist term when it's used to refer to an entire group of unspecified complainers. The only ones that would find it "sexist" are looking to be offended.
You can also say someone's "dicking around", and it doesn't have the same gendered connotation as "dick."
I used to think the same way. Then I worked a summer in a place where the n-word was used in place of it: such as "Oh, that's -work," or "I'm not sitting * (in reference to the middle seat)"
I came to realize this was a case of guys growing up in a slightly backwards environment getting acclimated to such talk. They weren't particularly hostile toward African-Americans and in fact worked alongside them from time to time. This was just a manner of speech that they had gotten used to, wrong as it is.
But it made me also realize that just because I became acclimated to "bitch" and "bitching" doesn't mean that it's OK, or that I've fully and totally disassociated the word with it's sexist connotation. Same with calling weak people "pussies." Grew up with that in high school athletics, and now it's a word I would never use.
> Most people don't take the word "bitching" as a sexist term when it's used to refer to an entire group of unspecified complainers.
Just because your intent was not sexist does not mean the word isn't sexist.[0] It's the same reason we frown upon people saying "faggot" even though they might not be directing it at a gay person.
> You can also say someone's "dicking around", and it doesn't have the same gendered connotation as "dick."
Most people are too fucking stupid to concern themselves with such things as gender equality.
I don't find it offensive, but it is sexist. It just shows a lack of forethought on your part and a lack of understanding of gender norms/privilege/etc.
Subtlety assigning words like that is sexist. And dicking around does have gendered connotations, if you don't realize that then see statement one.
the phrase "dick around" is actually from "dicker around" which is a 19th c. term. "Dicker" is to "Engage in petty argument or bargaining" and "Treat something casually or irresponsibly; toy with something".
So when someone is "dick[er]ing around" they are treating serious matters lightly or doing things in an unnecessarily protracted way; which is precisely how we use it.
The word "dick" however, which I would gather, people would envision it meaning "penis" here, simply doesn't work. We don't use "dick" as a verb, yet alone a progressive verb. "To dick" or "to be dicking" a person, although fairly clear in its sexual connotation, is certainly not in use, "dicking (with) a person" however, makes perfect sense, because it's from that ye olden term "dicker" again.
So "dicking around" has nothing to do with the slang term for penis or the disused colloquial meaning of a rookie detective, or it being an everyman; all wrong. Sorry to bust your bubble.
this is at once the best thing i've ever read by esr, and also a perfect explanation of how open source's image will always remain on top of free software's.
the second part didn't occur to me until i read through it again, but esr himself has been putting rms and (much less appropriately) anyone that sees value in his perspective in an anti-theistic kafkatrap, an especially damning and potent snare considering that both esr and rms are atheists. that kind of diabolical abuse has soured me on esr forever, but i admire how brilliantly he explains it.
You can also say someone's "dicking around", and it doesn't have the same gendered connotation as "dick."