I don't think you feel as bad as the next person wondering if the people spending 10k are addicts. If you did, I don't think you'd be willing to maximize how much money you can get out of them, and I don't think you'd be willing to call them whales. You can justify it to yourself saying you have no real evidence they aren't getting 10k+ value out of the game but I rather doubt you are particularly confident of that, either. And I doubt you went into the industry to spend your time trying to satisfy 5% of your users, especially given you have a deragatory name for them.

Which isn't to say I think terribly poorly of you, but it isn't entirely non-creepy.

Out of curiosity, do you offer users a feature to prevent themselves from spending money if they self-identify that they have a problem?