One thing I am realizing over the years is that while it might seem so, the best “social people” don’t actually have this built into their mind, they have some external system for capturing facts like the OP, and do the work to maintain it.
Whether that is writing the name of the person you met at dinner into your diary when you get home (including info like spouse/children), or calendar invites for birthdays of everyone you know, or whatever.
Reading “How to win friends and influence people” gives the same broad advice.
As you say, it’s a lot of work (though it might look effortless to interlocutors). But the flip-side of that observation is that anyone can get better by just using these practices. (Of course, social people are by definition more interested in this sort of study.)
One thing I am realizing over the years is that while it might seem so, the best “social people” don’t actually have this built into their mind, they have some external system for capturing facts like the OP, and do the work to maintain it.
Whether that is writing the name of the person you met at dinner into your diary when you get home (including info like spouse/children), or calendar invites for birthdays of everyone you know, or whatever.
Reading “How to win friends and influence people” gives the same broad advice.
As you say, it’s a lot of work (though it might look effortless to interlocutors). But the flip-side of that observation is that anyone can get better by just using these practices. (Of course, social people are by definition more interested in this sort of study.)