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I haven't been able to read this status update (it keeps timing out for some reason), so I'm just going off the title here. *

The downside of these hugely public, and permanent, appeals for information on someone is that everyone will want to know every detail of what happened, will discuss it, and dissect it publicly.

Imagine a situation where someone in our technology community quietly embarks on a suicide plan, as many people do every day. Once the word has gone out and a public search starts, there is an enormous pressure to go through with it successfully. Knowing that you're going to step back into a shitstorm of thousands of people asking what's happened. Which is going to encircle your name for a long time, if not forever.

I'm not saying there's anything to learn from this - it's just something to consider. I am in no way questioning the judgement of friends raising the alarm. It's just that strangers will feel, rightly or wrongly, that having read, and perhaps spread, an appeal that they are entitled to know the details of the outcome.

* I have absolutely no idea what's happened in this case.




The headline says it all. Both the Facebook page and the website offer no additional information. I'm glad she's safe.


Or if she fell victim to a crime - sadly more likely for a woman gone lost in a bar.


Or was in a car accident. Or had a heart attack. Or any number of other possible events which would result in someone being unconscious and treated at a hospital.


You are right. I do find myself wondering, even though it's none of my business, and suspecting the "worst" about a woman I don't know.

Hopefully, she just went on a bender, had a absolute blast, but it got a little out of control- perhaps resulting in dehydration or something else without too much social stigma.


> Hopefully, she just went on a bender, had a absolute blast, but it got a little out of control- perhaps resulting in dehydration or something else without too much social stigma.

As long as we're using the absence of details as a springboard for wild speculation, we should also consider the possibility that she was kidnapped by a pack of wild monkeys.


Who do you think is speculating? Hint: try reading in context. It works better.


A friend posted a suicide alert as a joke on Facebook a couple weeks ago and two days later the police came knocking. They ended up keeping him in hospital for two days "just in case". The only reason he was there was that someone doesn't get his humor and reported it even though most people knew he was fine.


edit: I guess it is worth noting that the misinterpreted public post and resulting hospital time was worse than whatever minor crisis than he was dealing with at the time. Fortunately no major medical bills (Canada) but he definitely lost a few contracts.


"We're never safe from people's kindness", says French comedian Jean-Marie Bigard...

Yet I suppose it's still a good thing in such cases that people care enough to do this ?

When it really becomes a problem is when the "kindness" is really misguided (religious nutjobs, etc.)


I'd say the attention span nowadays helps in cases like this one. People will carry on and nobody will know about her in the near future. Hopefully.


That's nice speculation, but not how suicide usually works. You commit suicide because you feel there's no one left who cares about you. The idea that there are thousands of people asking you what happened works somewhat counter to that.


Do you have a source for that?


Did the OP?




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