I don't know how. Perhaps in our DNA, but I don't know. I'd wager that liking certain physical traits in the opposite sex is hard-coded into our DNA so I wouldn't be surprised if other things were too.
But do I need to know how? Does the peacock, lizard or bell-bird need to know how?
I acknowledge you not identifying with the sentiment in question but may I ask: Is it in your mind conceivable that you are the one who has been brought up to view women in a way that is in opposition to your hard-coded nature?
For me 'your hard-coded nature' means that it's not something you can change without altering your biology.
Men seeking women to "take care of my house and children, be attractive and cook" is not hard coded in our biology in my view. That's because you have so many examples nowadays where that's not the case, e.g. house husband - a man who stays at home and cooks and looks after kids. Or even in the past - there are signs that women assumed the role of a hunter [0].
It's something that's taught or picked up from the society you grew up in, e.g. traditional view that boys play with toy cars and girls play with dolls or men are the bread winner and women are at home cleaning, cooking and looking after the kids.
So in that way, yes it's conceivable that many people have not been brought up that way and are not looking for women that "take care of my house and children, be attractive and cook".
And that was my whole point - to counter the sweeping statement that it's what men are looking for, because it's hard coded in their nature.
Your view is your view, so I don't get why you try to disguise it as some objective revelation. The whole world present & past generally happens to oppose your view. Anecdotal exceptions don't disprove rules, rather are a common trait of such. That NG article is meaningless, just full of speculation and a single isolated example of something that proves nothing.
> It's something that's taught or picked up from the society you grew up in, e.g. traditional view that boys play with toy cars and girls play with dolls or men are the bread winner and women are at home cleaning, cooking and looking after the kids.
Oh, very baseless claims + wrong assumptions here. Assuming that you are actually willing to broaden your perspective, I would highly recommend to you this talk on the human brain: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjE_yaJjXE8 - You will love it if you love studies, which you seem to!
Your last two sentences are in direct contradiction to each other. If you agree that you may have been raised and taught in a way opposite to your hard-coded nature then that doesn't counter, but rather supports (!), the fact that there is such hard-coded nature.
Since you seemingly like anecdotes a lot and rely on them for all of your argument (while at the same time attacking my view for alleged lack of empirical evidence), let me ask: Are you a stay-at-home husband as well?
Maybe we're having different definitions of hard-coded.
My definition of hard coded: something that's innate in us - something we're born with, e.g. encoded in DNA.
I don't think men looking for women to cook for them etc is hard-coded - because there are so many counter examples. Nature vs nurture.
Why do you think I was attacking your view? I was simply trying to understand why you think it's hard-coded.
And if you think that NG article is just speculation, then don't you think what you're claiming is also speculation?
I'm happily admitting that my comment is speculation based on what I'm observing.
But since I don't have a clear understanding of how this work, I'm asking these questions to get a fuller picture.
But you said you don't really know - so fair enough.
I do want to broaden my perspective and ideally with scientific research / reading articles by experts who have studied this subject for decades and I thought maybe you had those at hand to support the view that men are hard-coded (born with) to "looking for a wife— take care of my house and children, be attractive and cook"
But do I need to know how? Does the peacock, lizard or bell-bird need to know how?
I acknowledge you not identifying with the sentiment in question but may I ask: Is it in your mind conceivable that you are the one who has been brought up to view women in a way that is in opposition to your hard-coded nature?