I was worried this was only going to be a discussion of x86 assembly. Pleasantly surprised it included 6502 and RISC-V. It's worth reading even if you're not a teenager.
Can't speak for the OP but I really liked it. It reminded me a bit of the computer game Human Resource Machine[0], which creates a mini assembly language that you use to handle a "production line" of incoming numbers.
This is a great way to accidentally learn assembly language! I was so amused that a designer friend of mine who swore they could never learn to program solved this game and in certain cases, more optimally than myself, and I have a fair amount of experience in assembly.
Steve Gibson (grc.com) uses assembly for most (all?) of the software he distributes.
For example, his DNS Nameserver Benchmarking utility[1] is 160 KB and when you download it, it's a single uncompressed executable and has a decent win32 UI. It will run any version of Windows going back to Windows 95.
Could you even run a mid-90's era macOS or KDE+Linux executable on a current Mac or Linux machine? (I don't think Gnome even existed yet).
Not great not terrible. Analogies aren't that useful IMO, so it's cute but might not be a useful pedagogical aid.
Conceptual flaws (mainly down the line rather than introductory):
One issue with it down the line is that processors spend a lot of their design budgets avoiding carting memory around. You don't have to mention that explicitly but in my skim reading I would've (if I were writing it) tried to emphasize something more akin to a postal sorting room than a warehouse as per se.
Maybe that's too advanced, but I understood it when I was 18 or 19 so YMMV.
One interesting demo is to see how much assembly you can fit in a single memory access latency.
