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     volatile unsigned short lecturer;



Actually it usually ends up being much simpler than a compiled language. Something like this:

    delete from schema.hr.employee

    where employee.employee_type = 'Lecturer'

    having rownum = cast(dbms_random.value(1,count(*)) as int)
Most Deans' computers have it mapped to alt-delete. They don't even know what it does-- it's just called the "reduce budget function". Which is really unfortunate because when they hit ctrl-alt-delete on a frozen system, but miss the ctrl key by accident, some poor lecturer gets fired and at the end of the semester the Dean says "Huh, wonder where that budget surplus came from.".

Once an entire physics department was disbanded when their Dean's keyboard had a broken ctrl key.


In C++ we'd have to decide if lecturer needs to support move semantics.


Probably just delete.


Not if they're tenured. Then you can assume they'll never move.


Minor detail: lecturers don't get tenure.

The job role of 'professor' may be able to get tenure (I think these roles usually do) but 'lecturer' really means 'full time temporary teacher, with a contract for a specified amount of time.


I occasionally adjunct. What students call me at the beginning of the semester is always awkward:

Them: "Hello Professor"

Me: "Technically I'm not a professor."

Them: "Okay, we'll just call you Doctor."

Me: "Yeah, about that... not a doctor either."

Them: "So why are we paying you?"

Me: "Technically, you're paying the school. And the school is paying me... very little"

Them: "Answer the question"

Me: "Because I know stuff that you don't."

Mostly they still just call me professor and I feel awkward every time.


I knew someone who was TA'ing a class back when they were in grad school. I heard a story about him - to get ahead of this uncertainty he gave the class three options for what to call him:

1) 'Steve' (his first name)

2) 'Mr. Wolfman' (his last name)

3) 'Darth Wolfman' (funny, obvious not meant to be taken seriously, option)

Guess what the class overwhelmingly voted for? :)


I don't think you should feel awkward. I refer to all my teachers in emails as professor ( unless I want to list more detailed honorifics ). My current analytics guy is clearly very smart, seems to be in that adjunct zone, but I address him as professor out of sheer respect.


For all the complicated social protocols in that neck of the woods, this would be simple in Japan. You're just 先生 (sensei) and that's it.


If they ever ask "What do we call you?" you should answer,

"God-Boss."

(Pace Steven Brust.)


I teach first-years in Australia, where boys from private schools call me "sir". When I'm feeling mean, I tell them to drop and give me ten pushups.


> ten pushups

I'm guessing you don't teach computer science


OK. 10 push_backs() then.



Not the case in the UK at least.


    Professor(Professor&&) = delete;




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