My friend tried to do the “ideal farmer” route, rather unintentionally. He bought a cow, who escaped and mated with a bull down the road.

She had a calf, so he thought he’d share the milk the mother was producing with the calf. So he woke up at 6am to milk the cow.

The calf started waking up at 5:30.

So he woke up at 5am.

So the calf started waking up at 4:30am.

You see the pattern here. Turns out, calfs aren’t a big fan of having their milk taken, and there’s a reason they’re separated from their mother if you want to milk the cow.

Edit: some people are saying that dairy cows produce more than the calf can drink. I don’t know if this was a dairy cow.