It's not just about managing your own emotions, but emotional labor might also be about producing emotions in other people according to her definition.
I think that helps people expand the word's meaning, because "People feel good when they are in a clean house."
Apparently so, yes, but I'd contest that evoking an emotional response in other people is actually mental labor to begin with, and correctly applying the ideas derived thereof is then the emotional labor.
EDIT: It appears it's a two-to-Tango issue. All the cases mentioned are with another party involved, and whether it is to incite emotion or prevent it (i.e. e.g. hiding an aggravation as a flight attendant), the emotional work being done is within the subject itself.
Digging a ditch is not emotional labor, because "people feel good when they have the ditch they need". It is physical labor, because dig it.
It could have some part of emotional labor. It's hard, you have callouses on your hands, it's hot, your cloths are all dirty and sweaty, your co-diggers criticize your digging speed. You want to cry, you want to stop. You do emotional labor to keep going.
I think that helps people expand the word's meaning, because "People feel good when they are in a clean house."