It's been a random mix for me. The non-tech meetups (hiking, board games, etc.) that I've attended were often better experiences on average than tech-related ones, which were often a bit too focused on business interests.

I've only ever been to a few, but I found at lest two really nice: a Perl meetup in SF that wasn't really social at all but had great tech talks; and a Perl dinner (at a conference) in Vienna that had Very Odd Devs who were also super fun to talk to. People working at small regional banks can be way more eccentric than you'd guess!

It seems like all the problems you list are easy to solve, except odd devs, and I'm not sure that's a problem.

Admittedly, I'm too busy/lazy/unmotivated to solve them myself, but I can't believe there aren't some fun ones out there.

I mostly don't go to tech meetups, or any meetups where the only reason it exists is for networking. Those usually aren't that fulfilling. Sometimes if it's an interesting topic it'll get me, but usually not.

I mainly use meetup for board game nights, hikes, hack nights, game jams, movies, dinners, crafting, karaoke, and exploring new hobbies (there's a photography one I just joined recently).

None of those are usually in crowded places, stuffy air, have any sponsors or presentations, and have plenty of interaction.