I think that "Quit the hit show you created and get right to work creating another hit sitcom for another wack-job diva because you are just plain stupid." was Cybill, which seems to match descriptions of it's star. Also, it matches "Get fired from your second hit show because the co-star wins a fucking Emmy... and you're stupid." (Christine Baranski)
I think "FINALLY learn from your mistakes and create a hit show with wonderful, loving people. Late in the second season during a rehearsal suddenly realize they are not going to hurt you." was Dharma and Greg, after which he started on "Two and a Half Men"
I'm kind of amazed at the ability of the human mind to store all that information about those shows over the years, and kind of ashamed that my mind seemed to have most of the information on hand.
> Roughly nine years after walking through that first door, finally get a chance to create your hit sitcom.
I don't remember this show at all, but after some IMDb sleuthing I think he must be referring to "Frannie's Turn" (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103418/). It looks like it only lasted around six episodes.
I don't think much of two and a half men either, on the odd occasions I've caught some of it, but I really doubt that it could be fairly called "by far the worst show on TV".
Even if it were, I'd be wondering who has enough time to watch every show on TV in order to make such a judgement.
> I'd be wondering who has enough time to watch every show
You're right; it was hyperbole. But given my sample size I'm comfortable saying it's among the worst. It's a safe bet that an episode will contain at least one hooker, penis or poop joke. The characters are only barely developed - you can pretty easily describe each one in a few words.
Lorre has made some decent shows. I just find it depressing that 2.5 Men caters to the very lowest sense of humor and that it is so successful at it.
It's lowest-common-denominator humour for lowest-common-denominator people. Complaining about it is like complaining about Dora the Explorer -- you're not in the target market, so you might as well forget it exists.
For anyone who's only read the beginning and then quit, I really recommend reading more. The beginning is mostly a rant, but the rest is great.
"Turn in your first script which follows the executive producer's outline beat for beat. Almost get fired. Quickly write another script which follows your instincts and get an atta boy. Learn a priceless lesson that you will ignore over and over again during the course of your career. "
That's what happens when a site doesn't have a single canonical URL for each resource. The same problem causes duplicates on delicio.us or other sites focused on links.
Search engines deal with that by comparing actual content, maybe other services could take a similar approach. Of course in case of HN it's probably not worth the effort.
If it did have a single canonical URL, then the piece would be lost as the first one didn't make it to the front page in time.
I think this is not only a submission identity problem, it is also a ranking problem as many great submissions are missed that would easily make it to top 20 if they had the seed votes needed. (A parallel to startups not getting the seed funding they need :) ?) That's not to say it is a big problem, as HN has quality and in almost every case has the best on the front page.
An excellent piece. For those who don't know Chuck Lorre:
Chuck Lorre (born October 18, 1952) is a writer, director, producer and composer who has created many American sitcoms, including Grace Under Fire, Cybill, Dharma & Greg, Two and a Half Men, and The Big Bang Theory. Lorre also serves as executive producer of the sitcom Mike & Molly which premiered on CBS in September 2010.
I'm reading Anthony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential right now, and it has a lot in common with a lot of Chuck Lorre's writing, this vanity card in particular. I absolutely love reading things by people who are clearly passionate about what they do.
One of the few writers who doesn't constantly churn out cop/doctor/lawyer dramas over & over & over.
Just once I'd like to see a show about postal workers or trashmen or even construction crews. Anything but another cop/doctor/lawyer show. A truly gifted writer could make a show about almost anything interesting.
I couldn't remember any shows that centered around postal workers. Seinfeld had a regular character and a few episodes about the postal system (but then that show had an episode about almost everything). But it did make me think about "Get a Life" which starred an adult paperboy http://thetvdb.com/?tab=series&id=76500&lid=7
Construction crews was the same, I could think of several shows off the top of my head that center around the "idea" but none that landed right on it. There's Arrested Development which centers around a land development company (but really isn't about that all that much). Home Improvement, which isn't actually about home improvement and is more about a guy who has a show about tools. You said "show" but I'm guessing you meant sitcom/drama based on context so that rules out Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, since that's really reality-vertising. No worries, I'm sure someone on HN will figure this one out.
A truly gifted writer could make a show about almost anything interesting
I totally agree, including a cop/doctor/lawyer show. :o) One of my favorites was "Ed" on NBC ... first season only, though (http://stuckeyville.com).
And to add a dash of irony, as a bit of a gimmick two years ago the shows Two and a Half Men and CSI swapped writing staffs for an episode. If you watch the CSI episode with this rant by Chuck Lorre as a cheat-sheet it is kind of interesting how many of his little life-lessons made it into the final cut of the episode.
IMHO, it was at least as good as the endless Cop permutations on the tube. Probably better. It still bombed.
People like the cop,doctor,lawyer shows because they are all the same. They don't have to trouble their brains loading a new context. Its just the same show over and over with a slight ratcheting of the shock value of the crimes and or medical problems. Toss in a "very special episode" dealing with some social problem du jour and you've got it done without much effort from viewer of producer.
The first Dirk Gently is pretty incomprehensible to the mass market. You need at least a passing knowledge of Coleridge to understand it.
The second Dirk Gently is pretty weak, plot-wise. Dirk wanders around for a bit, figures out that the Gods of Asgard are walking the Earth, and barely plays a role in the actual story at all.
Given the mess that was the HHGG movie, I'm happy to leave Dirk Gently in the book where he belongs.
"Roughly nine years after walking through that first door, finally get a chance to create your hit sitcom. But it won't really be yours. You have no creative clout. Your employers have lots of clout so, ignoring the priceless lesson, rely on their series premise, their casting choices and their comic instincts. Your hit sitcom is cancelled in five weeks. Your employer calls it a "noble failure", but noble isn't the word used in any of the reviews. The word putrid is used twice."
>Roll your freelance success into your first sitcom staff job. ... After three years of miserable, seventy hour weeks someone ... cancelled
My Two Dads http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0092410/
>Facing unemployment, fight to get on a hit show that everyone else is fighting to get off of because the star ... my agent a mack daddy?"
Roseanne http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094540/
>the star, while undeniably talented, has a few personal issues not to mention a coke-addicted boyfriend
Roseanne (BoyFriend was Bill Pentland)
>Roughly nine years after walking through that first door, finally get a chance to create your hit sitcom.
Not sure, nothing on IMDB got cancelled in 5 weeks in this time period.
>Your employers think it's a swell idea but instead want you to write a sitcom about a blue collar single mom on videotape.
Grace Under Fire http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106017/
>gal cast by your employers to play mom, hates kids, hates people, hates sitcoms and, most importantly, hates you.
Brett Butler
>Quit the hit show you created and get right to work creating another hit sitcom for another wack-job diva because you are just plain stupid.
Dharma and Greg http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0118303/
>when you're about to quit the business in disgust, write a pilot script with an old friend.
Two and a Half Men http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0369179/