Telling people you have an anxiety disorder is exactly the kind of genuineness that is preferred by most people (in my experience), over ticking off boxes in a proscribed social interaction check list, or having a performative affect.
I did not say, and would not say, that you should not feel the way you feel. Advice on how not to behave does not speak to how one feels.
My advice does not apply to you if you have a disorder that requires you to handle social situations in a particular way. However, you should be aware that regardless of the reason why you must not be genuine in social situations you will be perceived as disingenuous.
On the other hand for those without a disorder, if you can tolerate being genuine or at least not intentionally fake about yourself and your interests you will have a better chance to connect with people.
> You seem like a person who isn't anxious about social situations...
You'd be right that I seem that way, you'd be wrong that I am that way.
What said is kind of a catch 22. The one thing a person with social anxiety would be reluctant to talk about is their social anxiety, the lack of talking of which further worsens the anxiety.
I used to be an extrovert/ good at social interactions when in my country, but have found it very difficult to replicate my social interactions in the US.
I break social relationships into 4 kinds. Acquaintances , close acquaintances , friends and best buddies. Each have very well defined boundaries. Having a pool of predefined things to talk about has made making acquaintances significantly easier in the US. Not having a rule set for interaction makes the options too wide, and causes a type of decision paralysis.
I still struggle with converting those to close acquantinces and friends, but I am getting better. And I am one of the good ones. Most people from my country only hang around people of their nationality because of being unable to make basic acquaintances with people. These people aren't socially awkward, just completely confused in a system with foreign rules for interaction.
I went on a tangent here, but I am sure there is a point in there somewhere.
I did not say, and would not say, that you should not feel the way you feel. Advice on how not to behave does not speak to how one feels.
My advice does not apply to you if you have a disorder that requires you to handle social situations in a particular way. However, you should be aware that regardless of the reason why you must not be genuine in social situations you will be perceived as disingenuous.
On the other hand for those without a disorder, if you can tolerate being genuine or at least not intentionally fake about yourself and your interests you will have a better chance to connect with people.
> You seem like a person who isn't anxious about social situations...
You'd be right that I seem that way, you'd be wrong that I am that way.