vs "I often feel like I'm the only one doing the dishes"
vs "I have gotten the impression you like helping out, but I also noticed that sometimes you don't do the dishes even when you have good opportunities to. Is something wrong? Can I help you get started with that in some way?"
I strongly prefer the latter. More verbose, yes, but it also acknowledges the other person does help, it does not assume malice, and it anchors a strong desire to help out. Which is ehat we want!
Huge fan of “too often” myself, along with “not always <get that out of the way up front>, but many times...”
I like your suggestion at the end of speaking from the speaker’s POV. I dunno, I first heard this pointed out in a 100 level psych class, a lot of folks here have been to college/uni. Hopefully this isn’t news to many. But we can be a forgetful lot.
You never do the dishes vs You often don’t help out with the dishes vs It seems like I’m always the one doing the dishes.