I live with a roommate. We're friends. He's like the only "social life" I have and it's not much. Just work at restaurant, work at home (web).
Often I'm fueled by the drive of escaping poverty. Sometimes though I actually feel bored. I just stop and lose momentum. Binge eat, pass out, feel bad at lack of progress. Like what is my life for? What do I enjoy?
I dream of working/living in a city but I'm also afraid of crowds/new people haha.
I don't know I want to be exposed to nature more like seeing grass, feeling heat, blue sky... I just spend most of my time in a box staring at screens. There is always something on, music, some show/movie.
I used to live in a fraternity house and was not really the cool guy I don't know throughout school I just wanted to be cool/fit in. I don't know I wasted a lot of time/money made a hole for myself.
After I crashed my car a few years back (nothing major just broke a tie rod), I didn't fix it. I became unemployed and I enjoyed the freedom of sleeping/waking whenever. This was also when I tainted myself financially and now (future) I realize my mistake.
I then committed myself to learning webdev. This thought of building high traffic websites and getting rich entered my mind (did not happen). I guess I couldn't commit to school. Man time flies. So yeah that's what I pursue, freedom.
Probably a negative thought but the one thing I notice in conversations is it immediately turns to "me" and it's prevalent in many places particularly YouTube comments.
Give me attention sort of thing. (I'm guilty of this too) but you're talking to someone and they immediately turn it to about themselves/compare/bigger-better than your thing.
Of course the YouTube comments section isn't a great source of examples in civil society. Maybe this is what conversing is, relating one's experience to others to show comprehension/care.
Yeah the diet part is hard, genetics is on my side thankfully but not with regard to heart (hypertension). I'm trying to figure out an inexpensive healthy diet to follow. I know extensive resources online. The other problem is sleep, freedom to go to sleep whenever/wake up whenever and of course get to work.
Often I'm fueled by the drive of escaping poverty. Sometimes though I actually feel bored. I just stop and lose momentum. Binge eat, pass out, feel bad at lack of progress. Like what is my life for? What do I enjoy?
I dream of working/living in a city but I'm also afraid of crowds/new people haha.
I don't know I want to be exposed to nature more like seeing grass, feeling heat, blue sky... I just spend most of my time in a box staring at screens. There is always something on, music, some show/movie.
I used to live in a fraternity house and was not really the cool guy I don't know throughout school I just wanted to be cool/fit in. I don't know I wasted a lot of time/money made a hole for myself.
After I crashed my car a few years back (nothing major just broke a tie rod), I didn't fix it. I became unemployed and I enjoyed the freedom of sleeping/waking whenever. This was also when I tainted myself financially and now (future) I realize my mistake.
I then committed myself to learning webdev. This thought of building high traffic websites and getting rich entered my mind (did not happen). I guess I couldn't commit to school. Man time flies. So yeah that's what I pursue, freedom.