I can relate to most of this, and I try to be conscious of this when I come across a dependency of a dependency that I find out is under maintained and should be fixed. In many package managers it is difficult to modify sub dependencies without changing the whole structure of the project.

For some other things, like in the Android Open Source Project, these things are very intolerable. Google employees mostly have a monopoly on development, and ridiculous stuff still slips through the cracks and nobody can practically modify it.