What's the one thing you actually enjoy doing that does take your out of your recursive depressive thinking for a minute?
Do more of that thing every day. Do less web surfing and less rumination.
It's all about mental habituation.
Allow me to randomly speculate that in your mental world, reading some Intellectually Fascinating Article has an extremely high priority, whereas eating dinner is just some stupid thing your body demands, and so because of this configuration of like/dislike or attraction/aversion you tend to chow down whatever is easiest so you can get back to the Fascinating Article.
That habit becomes deeply learned by your neural networks, reinforced by daily training. Fortunately your species has evolved the mysterious capacity of thinking and willing, so you can in fact make decisions that are counterintuitive to your own neural training.
You may find that you need some violent tactics such as temporarily cutting off your internet supply. That snaps you back to reality (oh, there goes gravity). Makes it way easier to focus on prepping veggies.
Isn't part of the problem that electronic or thought-based stuff moves too fast, is infinitely elastic and offers too little real friction-based resistance? Which leads to a stagnation of patience with actual passing time and physical reality. So I suggest doing whatever requires and encourages patience. Cooking is a great example because if you try to do it as fast as possible you will burn your garlic and that can very effectively train your neurons to chill out and do one thing at a time.
> Allow me to randomly speculate that in your mental world, reading some Intellectually Fascinating Article has an extremely high priority, whereas eating dinner is just some stupid thing your body demands, and so because of this configuration of like/dislike or attraction/aversion you tend to chow down whatever is easiest so you can get back to the Fascinating Article.
I literally just chowed down an easy meal and rushed back to my computer to continue this Fascinating Article, only to find this sentence, which described exactly what I was doing.
A mind is a fabulously diverse collection of parts, and each one of everyone's parts is shaped a little differently from everyone else's. It might be a little simplistic to assume that one strategy will work for anyone, sight unseen.
In my oughts and teens, I trained classical piano. Some days toward the end I was practicing for 4-6 hours during and after school, and I interviewed at the Boston conservatory. They told me they most likely would not accept me, but that's not really why I stopped. I knew I had to stop because despite over 15 years of serious intensive practice, I could still not make it through a 3 minute piece without my mind wandering off on some tangent of curiosity. At best my playing was distracted and unconvincing, and at worst (usual) I would screw up in the middle when my conscious attention came back to the present.
The only way I can stay task focused for longer than a few minutes at a time is by putting on headphones with a driving beat (EDM or similar) and stimulants. Caffeine is usually enough to get me through the workday. I'm a programmer now.
I made it through grade school and undergrad with respectable grades thanks to aptitude and quick learning, but I probably have an attention disorder that went undetected because of it.
>thinking and willing
One doesn't simply think away the structural defects in one's mind, any more than neurotypicals could transform themselves into genius IQs through force of will. A mind is shaped over time by internal and external influences, but plasticity drops off rapidly after the developmental years. Don't know your history of study, but why not browse through some videos of congenitally or traumatically brain-damaged individuals on youtube for some insight?
Thanks for the correction. I try not to assume neurotypicality and I should be more clear that everything I say is just a suggestion that may or not be helpful.
I agree that you can't think away structural stuff. What I wanted to say is that you can use clear thoughts and intentions to guide you to do things that deviate from your habits, which I think is mostly true.
For example, working around your attention problems by consciously using music and caffeine is something you could remind yourself of consciously in case you would forget. That type of thing.
I know that willpower is a tricky thing. That's why I emphasize thinking about something that you already enjoy and that takes you to a different mind state from the one that is causing problems. For me, that's cooking, but also riding bikes and walking. If I consciously decide to do slightly more of those things, that seems to be an effective and not-too-painful way of "improving" my average mind state.
Do more of that thing every day. Do less web surfing and less rumination.
It's all about mental habituation.
Allow me to randomly speculate that in your mental world, reading some Intellectually Fascinating Article has an extremely high priority, whereas eating dinner is just some stupid thing your body demands, and so because of this configuration of like/dislike or attraction/aversion you tend to chow down whatever is easiest so you can get back to the Fascinating Article.
That habit becomes deeply learned by your neural networks, reinforced by daily training. Fortunately your species has evolved the mysterious capacity of thinking and willing, so you can in fact make decisions that are counterintuitive to your own neural training.
You may find that you need some violent tactics such as temporarily cutting off your internet supply. That snaps you back to reality (oh, there goes gravity). Makes it way easier to focus on prepping veggies.
Isn't part of the problem that electronic or thought-based stuff moves too fast, is infinitely elastic and offers too little real friction-based resistance? Which leads to a stagnation of patience with actual passing time and physical reality. So I suggest doing whatever requires and encourages patience. Cooking is a great example because if you try to do it as fast as possible you will burn your garlic and that can very effectively train your neurons to chill out and do one thing at a time.