Thanks for providing the full context. I'm a bit surprise pg would pick a rather flimsy example. Fishing for flamboyant prose? Why not pick on a tabloid.

There's a ton of implicit communication that happens in-person that is hard or impossible to duplicate in writing, even through prose. Prose serves a purpose, and I'm surprised this essay doesn't grapple with that issue.

I think what pg really meant to write is something more like: be clear, get to the point, and be authentic. If the only way to do that were to write in a conversational tone, I think we'd quickly become bored and disinterested in writing itself.