I'd like to bring back an article, more analytical on this paratox (the title, Why You Should Never Pay For Online Dating, speaks a lot), from the old and now dead OkCupid blog. Funnily, this post was deleted just after the acquisition from the Match Group in 2011.

https://web.archive.org/web/20100821041938/http://blog.okcup...

Latest discussion on this:

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=33163930

OkCupid really went to pot after the acquisition. You can't even browse/search any more. It's all Tinder-style matching. Is that what people really want?

Online dating has gotten progressively worse over the past ~10 years. Even Craigslist personals is gone... Where can one meet a weirdo nowadays?

Met my partner in cl personals before it got shut down. Couldn't ask to be with a better person and we only saw each other's pics after writing back and forth for a bit.

Curious if text based dating sites exist any more or even text at first and photos only being shared after writing a while

KiwiFarms, or you could try 4chan, I recommend /b, but I am sure other spots will net you plenty of weirdos.

The actual answer was discord. Most of discords users are on those other websites anyway

Yes, but the discord pool is diluted.

Think about like 100,000,000 tons of 1% acid being discord.

And 10,000 tons of pure acid being the things I mentioned. It is going to be easier to get burned in the places I mentioned.

Discord has much more acid.... but when ya want the good stuff, you have to look to the specialists.

Feeld

You're in it bro

Oh man my comment on how Match group is a gambling app company is up there. I've been online dating for 20 years with pretty decent experiences as a short, ugly man, but now indeed the app/online dating situation is the worst ever. Some of this is probably due to me being older though.

With all due respect here - "20 years of successful online dating" sounds like an oxymoron! Unless you're choosing to date and to not enter into a long term relationship?

With all due respect, this seems like a Rorschach test? He didn't say "20 years continuously dating online"? People can date online a bit, get into a relationship for a quite a while, relationship ends, go back to online dating, etc.

This is semantics, but I think the parent's point is: if the relationship ended, was it "successful"? You obviously have different answers (and that's fine!)

If you can consistently eat out at restaurants every night, why settle for Mom’s home cooked meals every night?

Some will see a reason to. Others won’t.

You won’t see many home cooked meal enthusiasts at the restaurant, either way.

Actually this brings up an interesting point: the article implicitly assumes that the winning condition, the optimal outcome, is a long term relationship. But is it? Certainly many rich guys don’t act like that (stay w one person for 50+ years). This is important, because if we don’t have a consensus on what the best outcome is, that would explain why we’re not getting one. There may not be a single optimal outcome for that userbase.

We don't need consensus since consensus is impossible with a large population. You just need a vast majority and the vast majority agree on the winning condition.

The average marriage in the US lasts 8 years.

Isn't this (heavily?) influenced by a small amount of people who marry again and again?

Kind of. The median is apparently 19. Still, if a lifelong marriage is winning at life, we're a society of losers.

That's a big "if" imho. Especially, since there are more than enough instances of unhappy marriages in previous generations. Often people stayed in abusive relationships because divorce was heavily frowned upon.

Yes? You can be successful (or a failure) at being single, dating, or married. There's not one universally valid approach to relationships.

> “Personally, I avoid heating food in any plastic with an automatic default to glassware.” Beyond never microwaving food in plastic, Vandenberg hopes people simply stop using it. She says, “The market will provide us with alternatives if we just don’t buy plastic.”

I find really astonishing how the article demonizes plastic and ends recommending glassware use, placing a product referral that have PLASTIC lids. Shouldn't we stop using it?

In the wild, most of the glass food storage containers that I see have silicone lids, not plastic lids.

In any case, the problem here is when food comes into contact with plastic, which is not happening regularly with lids unless you store your food upside-down.

From the Wikipedia article: "Silicone compounds are pervasive in the environment. Particular silicone compounds, cyclic siloxanes D4 and D5, are air and water pollutants and have negative health effects on test animals. They are used in various personal care products. The European Chemicals Agency found that "D4 is a persistent, bioaccumulative and toxic (PBT) substance and D5 is a very persistent, very bioaccumulative..." So maybe silicones aren't great either

unless you have proof that the silicone in your drinking container leaches into your drink, then I'm unsure what you're saying has any relevance.

Well since we were talking about replacing plastic lids with silicone it seems relevant.

All my Pyrex lids are plastic. I'm away from home at the moment and can't check, but some "search engine research" suggests BPA-free #7 (the "other" category) plastic. I've seen glass lids with silicone seals, but never a fully silicone lid.

I'm not spending a lot of time microwaving those lids, though.

> In the wild, most of the glass food storage containers that I see have silicone lids, not plastic lids.

A quick survey of "glass containers" on amazon and walmart does not corroborate this claim.

You should not be putting the food in microwave with lids, plastic or silicone. Glassware with those lids are fine for storage.

Plenty of things are microwaved with the lid loosened or gently placed on top. That's certainly not a general rule.

A paper or light cloth towel suffices in place of a lid in every circumstance I've run across. Barring almost ready to eat meals in plastic containers designed for microwaving (which I use exceedingly rarely), plastic never enters my microwave.

I typically put a plate on top. Wouldn't trust paper or cloth to not ignite in the microwave?! At least my gf thinks I'm crazy to put things in the microwave that contain cloth or paper at all, and I don't know that it's safe for more than a few seconds. Food that I store in the freezer in glass containers typically needs heating for at least five minutes, usually more depending on amount

I can verify that paper towels will not combust after multiple minutes in the microwave. I usually dampen a (clean) hand towel to wrap/steam tortillas (under 40 seconds) and have never had an issue with that either.

I'm not sure that a dry cloth has enough microwave cross section (for lack of the proper term) to heat significantly, and a damp cloth therefore wouldn't go above boiling point. I'll experiment in my cheap office microwave.

Why do you think a paper towel would ignite? This has never been an issue for me. I use a paper towel which often times I can use for my hands or mouth after eating.

I'm doing it as well because I though it would be fine (I was mostly wary of BPA leaking from the plastic to my food so it didn't seem too big of a problem to microwave it), but that's a habit that you can change if you know about the risk. (And manufacturers should be mandated to engrave a warning in the lid “do not microwave” so that people are &actually made aware of it).

Ironically I always put the lid in for protection so food doesn't explode and stain the oven. Guess that was a bad idea.

for that, use an external/separate cover purpose built for this purpose

I don't think using a lid is a bad idea, like a plate or so, but maybe not the plastic you were trying to avoid in the first place!

The lid is not in (much) contact with the food, so there's no leeching, plus you can remove it when microwaving.

That's why I'm surprised there isn't more of a push for Corningware. Have we all forgotten? Porcelain containers with glass lids, everyone in the 80s has them. They last forever unless you manage to shatter them.

Mechanicisms matter. The article talked about plastic HEATING allowing it to leach into food that it’s TOUCHING. If you’re lids are not heating or touching food, maybe it’s fine?

Counter example could be condensation on lid heating,leaching, then dripping on food.

Yes, on a small scale, but they do exist! Just look up at Riseup, Disroot weho.st, or Autistici/Inventati.

Thanks for pointing those out. I think it could be done on a larger scale but only with buy in from the community and starting with one or two specific services e.g email or app infrastructure.

I'm a little OT (sorry), but I am wondering if is there a way to learn Rust while keeping up with the changes made from last edition (Rust 2018, which is 1.31)?

Not specifically, changes since then have landed in all editions. We did have a doc that described the full set of changes, but people didn't like it, so it got removed.

First off, good work! It is always nice to help people deal on this (sicked and badthought) platforms.

Anyhow, you should check also if a "tessera sanitaria" is considered a PHI since it includes the "codice fiscale" (and if I recall correctly, it is used often in "fascicoli sanitari" to identify an individual).

But well, I'm not a lawyer either.

> You know and have experienced things they haven't.

They also know and have experienced things you haven't.

I'd say that listen their description of the problem is the first (and maybe easy) part. But then you don't have to provide your solution, but rather find it together with that person.

Treating the other person as intelligent as you helps sharing the problem solving part instead of doing it individually.

I know what you're saying, but the question is interesting, perhaps poorly phrased, but interesting. And complaining about HN not being the right forum where to question seems something that I could read on reddit, not on here.

Wow, did you get something insightful from that?

Also, would like to say how you made all that?

Pretty much a Python notebook. Well one thing I remember was usage of the word "love". After we said it in real-life, there was a huge spike in usage in the chat. But the interesting thing is that even before we said it directly (eg "I love you" ), there was a build up of indirect usage (like "I love spending time with you").

Would be great if you pubslish your notebooks :))

Just a follow up: what do you use for secrets files, like ssh keys?

Everytime I find my self in some mess with too many keys to manage. :\

For SSH, KeePass + KeeAgent with the private/public keys as attachments to the KeePass entries. For other files, like a GPG export, again KeePass with its file attachment feature.

I use 1PW since I'm already on it. It does involve copy pasting stuff over to it and my own organization of tags etc

I always loved gmail for this. Still, I'd love also in my private email. How can I setup this?

Highly dependant on the setup you have.