I ahve exactly the same thoughts and I wrote a document to be used in case I die.

Part one is money and where the important papers are.

Part twonis hiw to dulb down my home. How to remove the smart switches (how to wire back the traditionnal switches). How to mive self hosted key services to the cloud (bitwarden, mostly) and what to pay for (domain and mail). Hiw to remove the access point and go back to the isp box.

My wife is not supportive of the smart stuff but now that she knows she can dumb it down she is fine. Honestly she does not realize what strp back the lack of all this stuff will be. But at least it won't be my problem anymore:)