I think it's probably more than just that. I think when applied ideally, NVC is just a method of character development. I think the point of the format is to create internal clarity about what is happening inside you (your beliefs and values) and in your interactions with other people. I think that sentence is about NVC, but is also just a general description of character building (at least a substantial part of it).

So yeah, people who now have a new format to say sentences in, but who make no changes internally are doing NVC wrong :)

NVC is just a tool. There are a number of them that accomplish the same or similar things using similar techniques and principles. Fundamentally, they are just tools for someone who actually wants to move the conversation forward. There are people who abuse the language for manipulation, and it comes across as insincere because they aren't actually trying to solve the problem at hand. I can name a few from my own past. NVC doesn't make people seem more or less selfish than they already are.

It's sort of like a programming language. It won't turn a shitty programmer into a good one, but it will turn a good programmer into a more situationally effective one. The hardest part isn't learning the programming language, it's becoming a better programmer.

The first lesson in the book I learned from, Crucial Conversations (https://www.amazon.com/Crucial-Conversations-Talking-Stakes-...), is to recognize when you are becoming emotionally driven (angry, defensive, etc.) and to step back from it. Another key lesson is to focus on identifying and solving the collective problem - the key point is that in the vast majority of cases, especially in the workplace, there is a formulation of the problem such that everyone is trying to solve it, but they are just disagreeing on how to approach it. In my own experience that's been consistently true.

These are both introspective processes of first getting yourself into the right mindset and then employing the communication tools. Learning to first be generous to other people was the hardest and also the most crucial change, whether or not I had communication tools to go with it.

“Would you agree that introspection and character development are important parts of a healthy NVC process? That an individual's application of NVC suffers without it?“

That’s my firm belief. It’s pretty much the same with all methods. If you just use technique without deeper understanding the result will always be shallow. We see the same with Agile. A lot of companies are practicing the methods but don’t really understand or follow the underlining reasoning.

Here are a list of soft skills that should be practiced to strengthen your ability to resolve conflict: Empathy, Non-judgement, Active Listening, Calm presence, Interrupting gently, Reframing, Asking effective questions.